Dangerous
by marvelnerd2981
Summary: Even the daughter of Ares gets insecure, and for Clarisse, her own feelings could be the most dangerous opponent she's ever fought. Review please :D
1. Chapter 1

Silence, thick and dark, filled the Ares cabin. I guessed that it was around 4:00; the sun was barely spilling over the horizon and the air was crisp. I looked to my left, and saw my half siblings, asleep still and sprawled in various positions. Waves crashed outside, barely audible, but they reminded me of my plan. The sadness returned, but also the steely resolve, the stubbornness that had always been my most distinct trait. I crept off the mattress slowly to prevent the springs from waking anyone else up. Crossing into one of the shower chambers, I looked at my reflection in the mirror. Emotions battled inwardly, and they were like no other opponent I had ever fought. Desperation, sadness, and doubt whispered to me like a funeral hymn, but determinedness just barely trumped them. I dared myself to move, and the thing about me was, I never backed down from a dare. The last mental reminder that fueled me was him, Percy. I wanted so badly for him to notice me, a fact that completely appalled me. Still, I couldn't fight it; my feelings weren't something I could just stab with my electric spear. Damn, I wish it was that easy.  
So, swallowing my doubt like a bad tasting pill, I reached into my sock and retrieved what I had been hiding all day: a tube of mascara, stolen from the Aphrodite campers. Normally, just thinking about makeup would make me scoff, but Percy had changed all of that. My feelings for him had made me desperate, not like myself. And I hated it. Uncapping the cylindrical tube, I inhaled deeply. I wrinkled my nose at the gunky black substance, but lifted the wand to my eyes, nevertheless. I paused with it parallel to my upper lashes, looking at my face. My mouth went dry and my breathing went ragged. Tears filled my eyes, making them burn. I squeezed them shut and threw the mascara wand to the ground. No, I wasn't going to do this! Unable to meet my own eyes in the glass anymore, I gripped the sides of the sink and bowed my head. Sobs escaped me, and I immediately caught myself, shoving my sadness back inside and stifling more tears. More than ever, I wished I was pretty and feminine, like Silena or Annabeth. I was ALWAYS taking a step down because of them, and I just wanted to able to feel pretty for once. A creaking sound rang in my battle honed hearing: one of my siblings was awake and out of bed. I knew they would be followed by more, so, forcing myself to look remotely normal, I scooped up the mascara and recapped it. Slipping it into my sock again, I stepped away from my reflection.


	2. Chapter 2

I wasn't myself for the rest of the day. I kept my head down during breakfast, not looking casually around for Percy like I did out of emotional reflex. Instead, I chewed my bacon silently, each swallow feeling strenuous and tiring. Nobody noticed my change in mood, but then again, nobody ever did. The mascara tube felt like it weighed a million tons in my pocket, and the seemingly magnified chatter around me felt heavy enough to crush me to death. I was just about to get up and leave when Chiron's loud voice parted the conversations, and silence fell. My eyes flickered upward, and fell right onto Percy. His own bright eyes were looking at me, something that took me by complete surprise. For a few seconds, we held each others gaze, but I quickly remembered myself and looked toward Chiron, trying to appear casual but feeling dazed.  
"Today we will be playing Capture the Flag," Chiron began, and I felt relieved. Capture the Flag always kept my mind distracted, plus I could kick some ass to let anger out without fear of repercussions. "Each team will have two assigned scouts, who will watch from a hidden location and observe the game below. The scouts will be using these to communicate, and will use gathered information to give their team advantages." He held up four walkie talkies, which were a little odd by camp standards. Murmurs went through the room, but died down quickly enough. "Any questions?" Chiron finished. When no one spoke up, he gave a small smile and returned to his meal. The loud noise started again, but with a more excited air. Even I was feeling a bit better; a dangerous game of Capture the Flag was just what I needed. As I turned back to my plate, though, my eyes caught Percy's again and whatever relief I had found in the impending game was gone.


	3. Chapter 3

The other campers and I waited at the edge of the forest, a buzz in the air that was only caused by chariot races or Capture the Flag. My brothers and sisters surrounded me, their hunger for violence gleaming darkly in their eyes. I, however, stood with my arms crossed and gaze staring at the trees, letting everyone mill around me. My thoughts were on the eye contact me and Percy had made in breakfast. I knew I was being stupid for thinking it could have meant something, but once again, I couldn't help it. I snapped back to reality as a high pitched shriek rang out, but it was only a nymph fleeing from a blonde satyr. I rolled my eyes, but I guess I looked more intense than I thought with all the brooding, because for the third time that day, I locked eyes with Percy Jackson. His expression was one of intense concern, which was odd, considering nobody ever worried about me, but he opened his mouth to say something. Just as he did, Chiron started speaking to us. I internally cursed the centaur, but was at the same time shaken by the repeated encounters with Percy. The centaur gave us our teams, and then announced the scouts.  
"The scouts for the Blue team will be Silena and Travis." The two exchanged a look, it seemed to be saying 'It could be worse and you know it.' They gathered their walkie talkie and ventured into the forest. Everyone's attention turned back to Chiron once their silhouettes completely vanished from view.  
"The scouts for the Red team will be Percy and Clarisse-" I blocked out, not hearing the rest of his words. Holy crap. There was no way I could be with him the whole day and not completely freak out! I inhaled and pretended to sneer at him before ripping the walkie talkie from Chiron's grip. Ignoring the "oooooohhhhhs" from the rest of the campers, I stalked into the trees without waiting for Percy. I took the time I had when no one could see my face to inhale and exhale deeply and kept crunching through the brush. I could hear his footfalls trying to catch up to me, snapping twigs and rustling branches.  
"Hey, Clarisse, wait!" He jogged next to me, but I restrained myself. Walking faster, I tuned my senses to our surroundings, my grip on the walkie talkie becoming sweaty.  
Ugh, STOP IT, I told myself. I focused on finding a fort that I had built on my own, right after coming to camp. It had been a while since I had used it, but I had spent so much of my time there during my first months that how to get there was permanently burned in my memory. Left at the rock that looks like a turtle shell, straight until the abandoned animal den, stand on the log to the right of it to climb the lowest branch of a nearby tree. The directions came back easily, along with memories that I had long since wanted to forget. I'd never told anyone, but I was really lonely, especially in the first few months I had been at Camp Half Blood. I guess I scared people away too much, and besides, who would want to be close with me? I swallowed hard and pulled myself up the tree, to a small wooden platform about thirty feet off the ground but well hidden by tree limbs. Percy scrambled up behind me, and I considered giving him a hand, but decided against it. I instead started watching down below us. From here I could see and hear a lot. My heart beat faster as Percy got settled next to me and we sat in an awkward silence. After a while, a voice rang out through the walkie talkie. It was Annabeth. I hated how Percy immediately answered her, but pushed my resentment down. I was already raw and numb from bottling up emotions, I didn't need any more to keep in check. After a couple of minutes of relaying information to our team and observing the game below, I needed to speak.  
"I hate this." Was all I said. It was the truth after all. He looked taken aback that I was starting conversation.  
"What? I thought you liked Capture the Flag?" He responded.  
"I do! I just hate..." I swept my hands in front of me. "This." He stayed silent, watching me tentatively, as if afraid to respond. It hurt that he was so afraid of me, but I guess he had good reason to be. I shifted guiltily. Taking a deep breath, I summoned the courage to keep talking. "I'd rather be down there, and-" Percy cut me off.  
"Kicking butt, like usual?" There wasn't anything mean in his voice, he was just asking a question, but it hurt like he had stabbed me with Riptide, his sword. I stayed silent and swallowed the lump in my throat that threatened to rise. My mind swirling with hurt, I tried to keep my voice steady as I asked him something that had been eating away at me for a long time.  
"Do you... Do you really think thats all I do? All I am?" He looked at me curiously. "Violence?" My voice shook with desperation as I completed my question.  
"I... Clarisse... What do you mean?" He sounded genuinely confused.  
"Never mind!" I snapped, not mad at him but myself, for trying to share my feelings. We sat in silence for some time, every now and then speaking more orders into the walkie talkie. Every time Annabeth spoke, Percy answered right away, something that irritated me more and more with every electronic crackle of the device. My jealousy of her grew more, and my insecurity stabbed at my stomach. I knew she was prettier than me, and more feminine. I was sure that Percy liked her, and every time the thought crossed my mind, I drew my legs a little closer to my chest. The lack of talking between me and Percy stretched infinitely, it seemed, and with every minute, the question I was longing to ask grew heavier in my mind. Finally, before I could bite it back, it burst out like water from a dam.  
"Do you think I'm pretty?" Percy looked at me in shock for a split second, but then his expression changed to concern. I forced myself to hold his gaze.  
"Of course!" He exclaimed gently. My heart stopped at this, but my own self doubt was suspicious of him.  
"I'm serious, Percy." I said quietly, turning my head forward and looking out over the woods.  
Suddenly, I felt his hand close around my own, and I lifted my chin off my knees, which were drawn up to my chest. Peering at him, I looked down at our hands.  
"I'm serious, too." He said as quietly, his voice fragile. I felt overwhelmed, and shut my eyes tightly to stop the tears welling in them. "Clarisse." I looked up at him again. "What's this about?" I couldn't speak through the lump in my throat. "Please tell me." He sounded so kind and gentle. Completely unintentionally, I let the tears in my eyes leak out. He looked taken aback by my tears but I didn't care. I hated myself for crying, especially in front of him. I forced myself to drop his hand and inch away, fumbling my dagger out of my belt and stabbing it into the platform to release my emotions. I stood and covered my face with my hands, turning my back to him as I regained control of my feelings. Several deep, calming breaths later, I stared out into the wilderness with a blank expression. Turning and sitting again, I pulled my knife out of the platform and began playing with the blade, trying to ignore the hurt expression Percy was wearing.  
"We have to keep scouting-" I began, but stopped when I felt Percy's hand on my arm.  
"Clarisse. Tell me whats wrong. Please." He was pleading, but his voice was firm. I stared back at him for a few moments.  
"I just...don't always feel..." I stopped mid sentence and buried my face in my hands, scolding myself, but his hand ran down my arm to my hand, which he held tightly. I stared at our hands, intertwined again. The sight gave me strength to keep talking. "I look at girls like... Annabeth. And I don't feel like I'm pretty. Or like I'm good enough for..." His curious eyes egged me on. "For you." As soon as I said it, a huge weight was lifted off my shoulders, but at the same time I panicked in my mind. Why had I just admitted it?! I swallowed the lump rising in my throat again, and watched his reaction. It took him a while to speak again.  
"Good enough for...me?" Unable to look at him, I stared at the walkie talkie by his side. "Clarisse, you should never compare yourself to Annabeth, or ANYONE for that matter. You are the most unique girl I know!" He reached out and touched my face, causing me to look at him again. Before I knew what was happening, he was leaning closer, until we were kissing. It took me a second to get used to the feeling, and I freaked out for a moment. But then, his hand squeezed mine, and I realized this was what I wanted. A thought struck me though, and I pulled away.  
"Percy, I'm sorry. For... Being so mean to you all the time. I'm just... Not really good at dealing with how I feel." I looked away in uncharacteristic bashfulness.  
Percy just smiled, though.  
"Hey, it wouldn't feel like Camp if you weren't around to banter with." He followed his sentence with a quick kiss, and then I broke into a smile. Suddenly, a crackle sounded behind him and Annabeth's voice erupted from the speaker of the walkie talkie. Instead of answering immediately though, Percy used his free hand to push my bangs out of my eyes. My smile broadening, I grabbed the walkie talkie instead, my other hand still holding his.


End file.
